L'Eau Commotion Westabout

9:00am Monday 18th December 2017 ( UTC-2 ) Normally we think of Science as that refined art where observations are made of things around us, their physical attributes measured and recorded and deductions made and tested as to their current state and possible future trends. Not so for the Climate Scientists of Australia. They have taken a whole new approach to the subject by first establishing and describing the dire outcomes to which we are doomed and then manipulating the data to illustrate the devastation that awaits us. Language is as important in Science as it is in all other aspects of our society so the first task undertaken by the Climate Scientist is to educate the young such that things which once appeared to be good are in fact the opposite and are indeed bad. I bring attention to their basic catchphrase Global Warming, Carbon Dioxide and the Greenhouse Effect and the implication that each and every one of these things is indeed bad and in combination catastrophic. Let us look at these individually and then as a whole. First of all - Global Warming is bad. Throughout the Pleistocene from 2 million years ago to 11,000 years ago when much of the Northern Hemisphere lay under extensive glaciation modern man as he evolved barely managed to survive with little to seperate him from his antecedents, but with the Warming that set in and its attendant agriculture and civilisation he rapidly became the unique creature we are today. Of particular note that in times of greater warmth productivity and progress accelerated, in times of cooling famine plague and pestilence prevailed. Next - Carbon Dioxide is Bad As young students in a previous Century we were taught that Carbon and the Carbon Cycle were an essential part of our very existence. Plants absorbed by photosynthesis the minuscule traces of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere to produce carbohydrates and proteins without which our bodies would soon cease to function. Ongoing research has unequivocally illustrated that with higher concentrations of carbon dioxide and a warmer atmosphere this productivity will continue to increase and as we enjoy ever increasing agricultural output we can divert much of this to our domestic animals so we can enjoy their milk and meat. Our young students of this Century are taught only that carbon dioxide is bad and to go home and tell their Mummies and Daddies to stop destroying the Planet. To Round it Out - Greenhouses are Bad Yes we tell our kiddies if their Mummies and Daddies don't desist from destroying the only planet we have by lighting up that gas barbecue and turning fresh meat into a frizzle we will follow their fate and fry as the Greenhouse Effect takes hold. So the climate Scientist has turned something that was previously held to be good, a Greenhouse where by increased warmth from the glass roof and the coke fires that also extended the growing season and exponentially the output of edible food, into something that is bad. Realising there are still a few adults left who have yet to be convinced that something that is good is in fact bad the Climate Scientist still has a few tricks up his sleeve. One of his best is to present data which undeniably shows a definite trend and then blandly state that in fact the opposite is happening. I bring attention to that popular shibboleth that we in the West with our wanton ways are causing the drastic rise in sea level and destroying the idyllic existence and swamping the very homes of our Pacific Island neighbours. One of the poster children of this thesis is the Island nation of Kiribati complete with pictures of mounds of plastic garbage as their nation disappears beneath the waves. There is only one catch to this which is not often publicised. A sea level gauge installed on that island in 1985 shows that in fact the sea level is, very slightly, receding. Look it up if it's still on the Australian Bureau of Meteorology Web Site, which also shows many re adings throughout that region with only small long term fluctuations. And I might add, look it up quickly before the Climate Scientist realises this oversight and homogenises the readings. Now until recently homogenisation was usually associated with full cream milk at your local supermarket until the strange matter of the RAAF temperature records at Amberley Aircraft Base arose. Taken to a rigid protocol since 1945, these written records show a steady but slight decrease in temperature over the last 70 years which is not in accordance with the Climate Scientist Scenario. You would think this would require some explanation but the Climatologist has a simpler solution. He states blandly that he has homogenised the records with a formula the operation of which is no ones concern but his, and the new readings now reflect the dire predictions already taken to be true and unquestionable. Now you might think this a pretty neat piece of legerdemain but wait theres more! Not only has he altered the written record he has altered the language he used to so do. Any etymological scholar will tell you that the word homogenisation is used to describe the operation of preventing the cream rising so easily to the top but in the broader sense to mix and make similar. But the climatologist has gone one better. He has now altered the word to convey it as an illusory increase in the written data and perhaps at the same time the very meaning of the word Science.