Picture: My uncle, me, Zhi Fay ("brother") and his wife, Ah Jun, standing in front of my ancestor's grave.

The most nostalgic part of our trip for me was when we visited the Zhongshan area where I was born. It was an overcast, rainy day, when Zhi Fay drove us with my uncle and Ah Jun, Zhi Fay's wife, to the village, a two-hour drive from Guangzhou. It turned out that it was not a village any more! All the rice paddies and vegetable gardens are gone! Instead, we took an off ramp from the freeway and skyscrapers greeted us as well as millions of textile factories, shops and restaurants. When I saw the present development, the image of my innocent little village was gone in a flash. We were still using kerosene lanterns and getting our water from a well when I left. Flush toilets did not exist. We drove past a small piece of rural area and then followed the narrow road that winds up to the "Back Door Mountain", my old stomping ground. But even that was different from what I remembered. Zhi Fay parked the car on the edge of the narrow road and we climbed up to the cemetery. After walking up and down the wet slope in search for my ancestor's grave, we finally found it. It was an emotional moment for me because I have been waiting to pay my respects to my grandmother's grave ever since she died in the 1960's. She died when she was 61 years old. We shared a room together from when I was a baby until I was eleven. We adored each other. Unfortunately, I never saw her again after I left China. I missed her so much that I cried every night when we first arrived in Hong Kong. If her spirit were around the day we visited her grave, she would be pleased that I came back to visit her. I shed a tear or two. The rain stopped momentary when we were at the gravesite and then resumed the downpour for the rest of the day.

Another crucial stop for me was a visit to the house of my childhood. It is located in the old part of the city away from the new development, where most houses are quite ancient and dilapidated. The same old, narrow, alley-like streets are still there. We could only drive to within a hundred yards (about 100 meters) of the house then the alley became too narrow so we had to walk. The gutters were gone where I used to play in the water during monsoon season. They were at each side of the alley. The narrow streets are constructed of large granite paving stones but some areas had been replaced with concrete slaps. The "Earth God" is still there; it is a granite stone chair next to our house where people still burn incense (joss sticks) and offered food in exchange for blessings. The "Earth God" was a good place for me and my friends to play when we were children.

Our four-story house stood there strong and bold and in relatively good condition. There was no evidence of mould or signs of deterioration of the walls. The wooden doors, stairs and window frames were in good condition but looked like they had not been painted in the more fifty years since I left. The teak furniture was all gone because they were stolen in the middle of night while the tenants were sleeping upstairs. Because of the narrow street, the thief got stuck with the heavy load so the tenant came after him with a pitchfork while his wife called the police. They caught the thief and the furniture was returned. To avoid future disaster and to keep the tenants safe, my uncle sold all the teak furniture in the house.

We have had different tenants in the house in the past but at the moment there is a couple with a teenage daughter. They don't pay rent, they are really just house-sitting. I don't think anybody has ever paid rent, they are usually distant relatives or friends. We were disappointed that they were not tidy housekeepers because mostly the rooms were filled with junk, including their bedrooms. The kitchen had been "modernized"; the wood-burning stoves were replaced by gas ones. The holding tank for the "toilet" had been converted into a flushable, straddle-type toilet and the well had been covered up and used as a washtub stand. We examined every nook and cranny and took many photographs. The top floor (rooftop) used to be my favorite place to play. From up there, it had, and still has, a fantastic view of the area because our house is still the tallest building in the old part of town! Needless to say, the house is not as glamorous as in my mind or in my dreams.

Despite the heavy rain, we stopped at a temple outside of the old district. It is a memorial for a local scholar who passed the annual examination for the emperor and became an official many years ago. One of the interesting parts was a large plaque, engraved with the names of the contributors. Everyone's last name on the plaque was "Lau". I remember they did not have to list our last name on roster at school because we all have the same last name! We only used our first and middle names. Nowadays there would be many different last names in Zhongshan but I am sure Lau is still the most common.

After visiting my birthplace, I felt that I had satisfied an aching need that I had had for a long time. I can now check it off my "bucket-list".