I don't think of myself as rich, but in world standards I'm very wealthy. We have had enough education, strong community support and parents who believed in us. Our parents were basically true middle class people who felt that was enough. They tried to direct, create opportunities, let us make our own mistakes with our lives. Risk taking in our 20's, the way our own children have done, is not possible for most non-white people in our society. The safety net needs to be there to feel ready for risky adventures of living on the edge. For both of us, and our children, these periods where we weren't concerned with gathering wealth or playing with our health, were important growth opportunities to "find ourselves." If I grew up in poverty, or as a person of color --with laws, justice, housing, food insecurity, healthcare, etc. all stacked against-- there really would have been no security. If it doesn't work out, they can't just come back home to get their parents to pay for wisdom teeth removal (as I did) or to gain strength and presents at Christmas, to do it all again. In my lifetime, I have gained more and more understanding that it isn't just money security, and the parental support that I had (although these are real)... but with my white skin... all who saw me (whether a cop stopping me for speeding, or other stuff) I carry a white non-invisibility safety cloak of sorts at all times.

Interestingly, with little access to the internet I wrote twice on our second day out, about privilege. Both posts were lost to the ether. We were in Damariscove Island preserve. The photo of the most amazing house ever, an old coastguard station, did post. A few years back, it was sold to a private family; multimillion dollars I'm sure! They were there while we were. The kids did what Peter and I did in our childhoods. Peter would spend time with a childhood friend at Turkey Cove (we hope to go soon) at a huge double farmhouse (two houses connected and with a courtyard and barn connecting.) They would do just what these girls were doing. Take the zippy boats out to fish, learn to swim in cold water, and just generally, "Mess about in boats." My parents met at a summer camp and they worked there, all my siblings went there, and all our children- Camp Killooleet. There, I was able to fully immerse in nature, learn crafts and most of all mess about in boats - mostly kayaks and canoes. Going with the flow, learning and making mistakes, catching frogs or noticing wading birds nearby, creating forts and just BEING a kid. What a privilege. We never thought our empty bellies would not be full in the next meal. We never had a care in the world, except the ones with our peers or rules of adults. All things essential for learning how to be in the world. These girls we were watching in this nature preserve Island, were probably 7 and 10 year old siblings who were each allowed to bring a playmate. They were doing it right in the summer. However, when you looked around you saw was an unimaginable home in the prettiest spot, a nice fast boat to get them easily back to Boothbay Harbor. Perfect COVID-19 pandemic escape. Not possible for most kids during this pandemic.

Since that first day out, it's been 20 days. We have done good escaping. It might really help when I have to get back to the classroom. It's eerie though, as there are very few other boaters "cruising." The few people out here have money, flexibility and white skin. I've seen two or three people of color, $7,000,000+ yachts with full-time captains for one guy, happy racers with old historic fancy wooden boats, and lots of working stiffs (hardworking lobsterman/women). I love Avelinda, our boat. This boat was purchased with my portion of the sale of my parents house. Not enough for a cottage on the coast, but enough to make this cottage go anywhere in Maine we want to go (in the summer/fall). I am very aware of my privilege- I try to do the right thing with it in my classroom, where I have the most power and control of anywhere in my world (other than my parenting which for the most part is done). I want to feel like my brother, and not feel guilty about who I am: white, with enough money, education, skill, and health, to escape and make isolation a gift rather than jail (as it was in the spring). I have come to terms with the fact that silence about racism is violence, and my next twenty years need not to be complicit with racist policies. I strive to be an antiracists.

I want to be devoted toward doing what I'm doing now (immersion in nature and my relationships), as well as making sure I use my privilege to communicate, listen, learn and do what I can with my determination and skills, to make the world a better place for the children of the world: my own, my grandchildren, the children I teach, and those most vulnerable children far away from my world (those ripped from their parents at the boarder, those far away and those in need). Although I contributed a significant amount of my Aunt L's money to Maine indigenous college scholarship, most of my contributions aren't in cash - but I can do other things and plan to. Please do what you can as well.

Thanks for listening. We are healthy and well!