Feelings. I have spent several Holiday Seasons away from home in my half century or so of Holidays. The first was new and exciting, a Navy man in Italy first time away from home. The second was in Puerto Rico also compliments of the Navy. This was quite exciting, I celebrated with Puerto Ricans and learned a lot about a different culture. Neither of these two times did I really miss home, oh a little but there was so much new stuff to absorbe.

Later in life, I cruised to the Bahamas where I spent two Christmas Seasons away from home. But I was married and so really home was where we were. We were also very active in the cruising community and there were many people who celebrated with us.

This Christmas Holiday was different. Different feelings. Things had changed over the last 10 years. I was a different person, my life was totally different and I was in a different place. I arrived in Mazatlan a little too late to meet local people to learn their culture, I had no family with me and even though the people were nice and we had a wonderful party several days before Christmas I was for the first time feeling alone.

I love Christmas. I played my 3 Cds. Bing Crosby, some misc music and one with Bing, Sinatra and Nate King Cole. I just could not get into it for some reason. I love the food. I missed the old favorites. I had a stocking hung with care on one of the hand rails. It was empty. I felt that way also. There were no invites to Christmas dinner or drinks. I know that single handed sailors in a sea of couples are overlooked when it comes to personal times like these. It comes with the territory.

I awoke Christmas morning with the same kind of lonliness but that was cut short because Pat was coming for breakfast. I had to get cooking. It was a beautiful day and breakfast was great. Fresh ground coffee was brewed, potatoes with garlic and onions fried up crisp, chorizo and eggs, tortillas, cantalope and refried beans were consumed outside in the warm sun. I was feeling better. During the day I set out to complete some chores I had been putting off so I was feeling pretty good about getting something accomplished.

Pat cooked dinner. Salmon with butter, dill and lemon barbequed. Garlic toast, a huge green salad and Rice Pilaf. It was a cold clear night so we ate down below in the cozy warm cabin. Very nice.
Even after all the food and comradrie I still had that feeling of being alone.

By the end of the day I finally accepted that this was how this Christmas was to be this year.

In the morning after a great night sleep. I felt great. This unusual Holiday was gone and the lonely feelings I had vanished as I looked forward to new adventures.

I am not a feelings guy, but this year...