The sea, ships & boats – all have featured large in my life. First in the navy, when I went to sea for months on end, then as a hobby (for want of a better world) when I got posted ashore. My family and my boat are all what matters to me. They are my life, and they have sheltered me from the real world most of my adults life. A real world in which I sometimes find ill at ease and for which at other times I find myself ill prepared.

The children have remarked upon this. Dad leaves the house for three reasons, and three reasons only:
1. To walk the dog
2. To go to work
3. To go to the boat.

I quite like my job right now. Hours of boredom and moments of frantic activity (bit like sailing). I know my job, and I like to think I’m good at it. Because I work shifts, I have ample time off. Time to walk, read (a lot) and write (a little). It’s what I do, it’s all I need.

Sailing is like slipping on a favourite, old and comfy sweater. It comes naturally and it makes me feel at ease. The world makes sense when I’m sailing. ‘Fuck it’ seems an appropriate answer to any shore based problems I may have.
A quote from one of my favourite movies (Apocalypse Now) seems fitting: ‘Never get out of the boat’.

Children are growing up fast and retirement is approaching. The boat we plan to take around the world is as good as finished. Now what? Living aboard full time seems daunting. How will we cope with not seeing the children (and eventually the grandchildren) on a regular basis? How will my body cope with abuse the sea throws at it?
I have long resisted the idea of buying a house. It seems so ‘permanent’. Especially since at the age of 46, I haven’t even figured out what I want to be when I grow up.

The two most stressful periods in anyone’s life are divorce and buying a house. And divorce is not on the cards – I hope.
For the past 4 months other people have effectively put our lives on hold. We’ve be kept waiting whilst they made us jump through numerous administrative hoops. Whilst they considered whether we were worthy or not. I like to be in control of my life; of what I do and where and when I do it. Lately this has not been the case, and I have HATED every single minute of it.
I have landed Brigitte with more than a fair share of the hoop jumping. I know it’s not fair, but she has the better people skills. I’m very grateful though, and I hope I can make it up to her.

We’re in the final furlong now, about to commit ourselves to a couple more years of financial servitude, but it’s all starting to come together. The finish line is in sight.
A boat and a house to call home: It will have taken a lifetime of sweat and toil, but how many out there can actually say that they will have made their dream come true?

I probably shouldn’t be writing this. I’m rambling, I’m too exhausted, too cold, too ....