Thursday March 28, 2013
After a worse than usual last minute rush to pack and clean up loose ends we finally pulled out of Grand Bend about 1:30 headed for Kitchener where we would get a shuttle to YYZ for our flight to the UK and then on to Turkey. Had time for a short visit with Erin, who looks terrific in her last week before launching motherhood.
The past 2 weeks have been surreal. On March 13 my brother David and I travelled to Pinawa MB. for a visit with our brother Doug who has been battling cancer since last fall. The day we arrived they learned that it had spread further and he was now palliative. We enjoyed visiting with both Doug and Marlene, and in the following 3 days shared lots of memories, laughs and even a few games of euchre. By Saturday his condition deteriorated and he needed to be admitted to the local hospital where oxygen was available. I decided to stay another 5 days and was able to assist Marlene and Doug with the organizing of their income taxes and the handoff of his business contract for the retirement home he managed to his successor. Doug continued to manage the house and choreographed the days even when in hospital.
By Monday things had begun to spiral downhill and he began to lose his ability to read and his breathing grew more laborious. Marlene held down the hospital vigil with help from her girls who have always treated Doug with the highest esteem. Brandie especially was able to be close and always added a touch of perspective and some practical suggestions. Marlene was there by his side making sure he was comfortable and supporting him with all her love through the entire ordeal.
I stayed overnight on Thursday March 21st in the hospital with Doug and by that time communication was hard for him but he was still completely in touch with what was going on. Friday morning I had a very hard time leaving knowing I would never see him again. We parted as best bros and good friends and I was confident that he was not afraid and not in too much pain. I hope when my time comes that I can be as strong and selfless as he has been throughout all of this. In spite of never getting anything but bad news from the first symptoms, he refused to complain publicly and continued to worry about Marlene and Jen and the Ironwood Retirement Home while maintaining a sense of humor and outward calm. To say that I am proud of him is a colossal understatement.
His death on Monday May 25th was peaceful and for me, a quiet passing which came as no surprise. The hardest part was to share the news with Jennifer, Doug's daughter who has been confined to bed for a month due to a high risk pregnancy. She was able to find the strength to take the news in stride while focusing on her starring role as her child reaches week 27.
Flying off to Turkey felt like running away with the funeral the following Monday. Thankfully, Marlene had promised that a memorial and interment service would be held when Jennifer was able to travel.
Brian on board Necessity, Marmaris Turkey