SailBlog

Each new place I go, there is such a welcome, I am so humbled... Hands lined the dock in Shelter Bay, Colon, a safe haven for those transiting the canal, tucked within the breakwaters of the Panama Canal. The entrance is slightly hidden, opening into a channel revealing the docks and facilities that will become a refuge for Inspired Sanity and I as we complete the tasks needed to complete the solo circumnavigation to Rhode Island... only 1800nm away.

What had only been voices on the phone or SSB radio, VHF, became the smiling faces accepting my lines as we pull gently into the dock, hand picked for us to make it easy, somehow John Haley, intrinsically realizing the extent of the relief I was feeling, but also the let down of weeks of stresses, and the last 36 hours of miracle upon miracle that allowed Inspired Sanity and I to pass through the Canal...

As the sun is rising on a new day, the birds singing in the jungle forage across the channel, sweat already pouring from my chest, though there is a pleasant breeze still this morning, the morning meditation time ushers in wave after wave of tears of gratitude... the hand of Life energy to carry me through is evident in each memory... the way, once again, not made easy... but with each challenge came the heightened willingness of everyone involved to get me to the other side of the canal. The Canal advisors became my advocates, willing to ask James and Jen to consider rafting me through canal, a policy that was completely lieniancy on their part when considering the normal rules of canal passage. I was astounded when they suggested it... my outboard engine faultering before we even made it into the first set of locks...they could have sent me back. There were hands reaching to adjust fenders, tighten lines, willing to be drenched as the spray that catapulted up from between SV Clarysse and IS, fended and rafted together, the insurance for the Canal advisors that I would get through the canal, the graciousness of James and Jen who, with no hesitation, volunteered their boat and accepted the delay that it would be for them. "We were not going to leave you behind, Donna." As I trace through the memories, the smiling gentle faces of all of those who I have encountered, the profound outstanding revelation has been that of the deepest genuine genravitous integrity possible... The nature and character of love and life has been manifested toward me in every facet of my experience, especially since February 13th, when IS and I were knocked down twice, rolled over...

A precious revelation this morning came as I concidered the faces of those who have so naturally given of themselves, the younger couples I have met... their eyes meeting mine, each one, not hesitating to truly gaze at me, to see me, to care for me... and I realized this morning how each of them carried the deep love and desire of my children to be here... to help me, to take the load, to lift, to provide what I needed. I commented often to Maurice from Atmos, how much he looked like such a mix of my boys... lighter hair and features of Keel, but the broader build and laughing smile of Cooper. There were strong arms there over and over to help me with some task, Oscar from Pilas, another young man who was the emodiment of the heart wishes of my sons to far away. Dieuwka and Sherry, Ilona, and Jenn, my girls, Ptarmigan and Kristy... reassuring but also strong and taking up some task for me, so available to give me a lift and keep in touch with me to ensure I was making out OK ... Then it was James and Jen on SV Clarysse who opened their hearts to help me without any consideration... the blessing to me flowed from them so easily as to allow me to accept it ... I could almost hear Keel's voice when James spoke...

And, I was met by gentle eyes that spoke for my Bob, having to remain stateside to manage the influx of all happening there, the incredible influx of support both financial and spiritual... answering the endless calls and emails of those concerned at times, wanting to help in any way they could. ... But he was distraught at times as he could not be here to by the hands and support at my side, where he so wanted to be... It was Bob from SV Nirvana, who looked after me, over and over again providing the tool, the fuel hose jury rig, the lift for my line handlers... He was watching out for me from the first moment I arrived. It was his and Sherry's dinghy along with Ben from Guenevere 1 and Christian from TiaTonga, who escorted me to a mooring once I got around the bend past the western side of Islas Flomenca when I first arrived. It was Sherry's cell phone with which I was able to call my Bob for the first time since we lost the faithful satellite phone connection, six weeks be fore.

My Bob procured, Roy Bravo, as a Canal Agent, but in every way, Roy too, looked after me, and it wasn't easy. Inspired Sanity was not prepared to make a canal crossing, but once again, Roy was willing to take on the incredible task of finding an outboard and outfitting IS with the gear she needed to make the crossing on her own independent power, that process ending up leading to endless phone calls, mechanics, welders and even smoothing the way with everyone in the process... even the Balboa yacht club. It was such a challenge for me to not speak spanish midst this incredible process and Roy was my translator along the way. Roy's crew for the canal crossing were professional, and utterly accommodating especially given the size and lack of amenities on IS... they slept the night, all four of them, on deck, no cushions, ... without a single sense to me that they were uncomfortable... Eric was the crew leader, and my first mate, taking on the task of managing the outboard throu ghout the passage. An broad smile that always believed for the best even when we both heard the first sound of the engine faultering...we worked together through the trip ... Eric keeping his hand to that tiller off the stern nearly the whole time.

It is amazing to me, in this moment...it is their eyes I see, gazing fully into mine, willing to engage in life with me, not an apathetic moment, only Life flowing through each of them... all happy to be of help to me. Their eyes are carrying in them the life of each of you, my Mom...my family, and all of you, my friends, Joan, who set in motion the chain of support here in Panama that would be waiting for me when I arrived, fully engaged already to help me. John Haley, on the dock to greet me in Shelter Bay. Glenn and Kyle who picked up the mantle early on as I was just approaching. Each of the SSB radio nets, from Peter in New Zealand, Wolffe in Patagonia, and then to Ben in Panama City...Most of your faces I still have not met, but the life of love and care flows in the eyes of compassion of those here who have loved me with your intent in this place... Energy...it is the way it moves. A bit of energizing far away simultaneously effects the flow of energy throughout the universe, the effort finding its way to me as you all have prayed day after day, joining me in this meditation. We are a fluid life energy all together, only temporarily separated by the bounds of our humanity. I am so blessed to be the recipient in this moment...

Only Gratitude to you all...

Bob and I had the long chat we had been longing to have, finally able to just linger and allow the silence to bring the next thought; oh�... even if only by Skype�...it was a balm to my being to be connected, sharing the venture, the challenges not only for me here, but those at home�... Bob�'s beloved sv Calypso, our home for our next season to come�... calling to both of us for the attention she needs. I am going home soon�... It is now only 1800 miles�... but still 1800 mi�... My day has been magic meeting the folks here. It has so reinforced the dream Bob and I have to cruise. Shelter Bay�... truly a shelter within the Canal system�... Thank you John Haley and all your staff�... Joan for your gracious introduction for us here. �... And to the cruising community!! Fairest of Winds and love of the oceans, Only gratitude Donna