So, Marina LaCruz has been an absolute riot! I’ve attended seminars on weather, medical emergencies, sail trim, boat maint. provisioning for the south pacific, electronic charting & on & on! Live music any night of the week, great eateries, fun people, it’s a mecca of distractions in the highest order!

I get a text from Howard & Pam….Hey! would you be able to watch “Bula” for a couple days as we have to return to the US and sort out legal stuff for our residency blah blah…I’m like YEEES!!!!….finally, a break from the hot marina & hot boat….what’s not to like!…I’m jacked. I get to stay in the kick ass penthouse with a view, sweet pool and amazing kitchen. What’s not to like?…oh, yeah, plastic poop bags, not a fan, also not a fan of idiot pet owners who let their dogs off gas shitty pet food into disgusting piles of shit that they don’t pick up, in which I step. Not a big fan of that either!…so off we go

Howard shows me how to install this harness thing that looks more like a cross between a chastity belt meets full face muzzle like Silence of the lambs….all the buckles & leaders…two leashes? Ok, I can figure it out. Thankfully Pam left a very detailed list (at my request) of walking times, routes NOT to take, meals etc. Let me tell you, this dog eats better than I do! Human food, prepared kindly for a dogs health. At first I rolled my eyes at the prep, but then realized this dog is super healthy, shiny healthy thick coat and tons of energy….we should all eat better :)

They left, Bula didn’t even notice….door shuts….we both look at each other for a minute…then at the same time yell out “PARTY!” Wooo Hoooo!!!! I threw her toys, wrestled with her…goofed off…we were having a blast…then - she just stops. Looks at me, and sits there…staring….oh, shit….literally…it’s time. Uh, oh god, that buckle thing…good god…how did that thing work again?

After fiddling with the damn thing for 10 minutes, she finally looked at me with those eyes like, “DUDE!…you idiot….it ain’t rocket science…..this goes here, that goes there, buckle the goddamn thing and lets get on with it!!!…I’m like, “thanks dog…ur a big help”….off we go down the elevator to the garage level…I wave to the security guard, go through the gate….and she is off! Now, I don’t have to tell her where to go, she’s on a mission…first stop, pee break, on a strip of otherwise burnt out lawn (thanks to her!) and off down the dirt road toward the next stop…..when will it happen? I’m hoping she’s constipated until they get back, could I be that lucky!??….uh, NO! abruptly she stops, assumes the position …..and out comes this absurdly huge pile of…yeah….she looks at me like…”come on dodo…pick the stuff up!…I got more shit to smell and bark at!”…..Thankfully (due to aforementioned diet) It was pretty firm….so after gagging while picking up….it was done…I’m now broken in :)

Back at the condo, she gets fed, brushed, sang to, read to, walked one last time…and it’s off to la la land…or so I thought :(. Dog can’t settle, on it goes…toys on my bed…licking my face…playing around throwing her toys in the air…finally gets bored and goes out on to the deck to sleep…..1am….barking starts…she sees some mexican dudes walking on the street below….I squash this bad behavior in a New York minute by closing the screen door and telling her to LAYDOWN!….enough said.
Oh…I paid her back…at 0600….TIME TO WALK YOU LITTLE>>>> :) Let’s just say she wasn’t impressed….but we got along famously, so fun to have a dog again even if only for a day or so. And…the chicks dig the dog! HaHA…everyone’s gotta have a dream, LOL!

They come back the next night….I vacuumed up 10# of dog hair, did my laundry, ate their food, took long showers & read…on the deck, looking out at the magnificent view, total win in my book!…My job is done here.

I hope they have me back for more dog dates…such a nice diversion from the boat…